Warp Speed Factor 15, GO!: Episode 05: The Enemy Within

I'd like to present a case of animal cruelty against the crew of the USS Enterprise for their treatment of this unfortunate looking creature:

The subject is a space dog, a creature that is apparently a cross between a border terrier and every member of Ratt. After discovering the creature, who from now on we will call Rikki Rockett, the crew takes him into captivity and beams him aboard for no apparent reason. Seems likely that Kirk just wants to put its pink horned head on his wall.

As soon as they bring Rikki onto the ship the abuse of the animal begins as a fault in the transporter rips the poor creature's psyche asunder and its body manifests into both good and evil halves. Slow to catch on as usual, the crew puts the creatures in Scotty's care only to have the callous Scotsman lock the delirious puppy in a box causing it to go wild from fear. He didn't even supply the dog with its requisite daily dose of "Sister Christian." Unbelievable.

The only time the animal receives any attention from the crew is when they need a clue regarding their own seemingly more important dilemma. The fact that the Captain split into good and evil versions of himself, with the evil version walking about the ship, drinking brandy, and attempting to rape Yeoman Rand, while the good version cowers on the bridge and whines, apparently is more important than the well being of their pet.

In order to solve their own predicament, Spock, Kirk, and McCoy begin experimenting on Rikki which culminates when they place both halves of the creature on the same transporter pad, send their scrambled atoms into space, and then re-assemble them. The experiement does manage to realign the dog, however it also succeeds in killing it. Smooth.

RIP Rikki Rockett--Hair Metal Space Dog, Episode 05-Episode 05.

Seriously though, besides putting this poor terrier in a ridiculous costume, this episode is full of amazing Shatner camp as the man freaks out and throws a tantrum at least every other scene. It's truly remarkable.

One scene in particular stands out as the best Shatner moment well, ever. I can't even think of a way to properly convey the magic that takes place in the scene, and I feel that I can only do it justice by just showing you.